The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her
So that he shall have no need of spoil.
- Appreciation We must begin to learn, understand, and appreciate their heart. How can our partner’s heart “safely trust” in us if we do not even recognize when they are sharing it? Often times women project feelings a certain way and expect their partner’s hearts to work the same way. For example, if our partner does not come across as mushy all the time, or does not say “I love you” all the time, then they may think their partner is not sharing their heart, or at the very least are shallow or holding back. Keep in mind actions often speak louder than words. While they may not say, “I love you” all the time, they may be showing us in little ways. For example, my former husband was not very expressive about his feelings, yet early in our relationship he spent all night one Christmas Eve many years ago “building a teddy bear” that played the love theme, “Somewhere My Love” from the movie, “Dr. Zhivago.”
- Attention Our society and culture continue to feed us lies about how relationships should be. These worldly expectations are not only self-centered, but unrealistic too. Many times our partner becomes discouraged when we do not pay attention to them, or feel as though nothing they do is ever good enough, or we wish them to be someone they’re not. It is not at all uncommon for both men and women to have fantasy-driven standards of what their partner should be. Often times, what we see on television or in movies, or read in novels shape these fantasies. Allowing our hearts and minds to entertain such fantasies only leads to discontentment in our relationships, or worse. To ensure our partner trusts our heart, we need to learn how our partner’s heart works. We must recognize their vulnerability – rough edges and all – taking care never to compare them to anyone else. When we let go of our expectations; when we allow ourselves to be “in the moment” with them without distraction, it is then we truly listen. And when we are truly attentive and really listen, it is then we hear and feel their heart.
- Affection By nature, God created both men and women to desire affection and intimacy with the one they love. In fact, the need for affection is very basic. While we are all capable of providing our partners with much warmth and affection; a sense of home and respite; a safe haven filled with comfort and enjoyment, none occurs by accident. All require focus and conscious effort on our part. Does your partner find you to be a warm, gentle, and peaceful place, or does he come home to find you preoccupied, self-focused, and uninviting? Affection builds trusts.
Remember … touch a life today “The Little Way” by following the lead and need of others. Also, if you ever thought to yourself, “I wish my community, knew…”, then be sure to visit White Light Communications at http://www.tothewhitelight.com.